Well, we certainly should blog more often.  We could all make a huge list of  “shoulds”.   I am sure that everyone has a list that might start like this….

I should clean out that hall closet; I should clean out the garage; I should dust the top of that cabinet; I should read that classic book I have always meant to; I should prune that tree out back; I should take a vacation; I should throw out that tattered sweater.  These shoulds are important to the organization of our lives and often help clear our lives of clutter and help us realize personal goals.

Then the list might go on to something like this…. I should exercise more; I should eat more vegetables; I should have my cholesterol checked; I should go get a physical; I should get more rest; I should stop doing X because it causes me so much stress; I should read more often; I should get a massage.  This list involves taking care of ourselves.  What a selfish thing to do.  Right?  Wrong…. this list of shoulds is very important.  Taking care of our personal, physical and mental health is very unselfish.  It means that we will be best able to care for others and do the work that God has called us to do.

And somehow last on our list comes this list of shoulds….the list that should not be a should at all (I know sounds a little like Dr. Suess). I should go to church; I should love people more; I should give more of my time, talent, and resources to those in need; I should pray; I should study the Bible; I should learn to trust God.

So what is this blogger going to do?  Well, I said I should write on this blog more… but that is not my first priority.  I must learn to pray and trust in God to provide… To provide the time and knowledge to take care of all that comes with being the family of the stroke survivor; to provide patience; to provide healing; to provide guidance and peace.   This blogger learned to pray from  a prayer warrior; this blogger knows first hand the power of our Lord Jesus Christ, and, yet,  this blogger struggles daily to give over to God all that comes with being the caregiver of a stroke patient. We tell this to let you know IT IS NOT EASY.  Not easy to be the family of a stroke survivor and not easy to trust in God… it should be (there comes that word should again), but, somehow, we find ourselves relying on our own strength.

God raised Jesus from the dead.  Even death is no match for our Lord.  So why is it so hard to trust in God?  Why is it so hard to let God deal with the trials of life?  It is human nature to become self-sufficient.   I am sure God sees us much like we see a 4 or 5 year old child.  The toddler says, “Nooooo, I can do it myself.  Noooo, I can brush my own teeth.”  Then after a few minutes of trying to complete the task alone, the toddler cries out,    “Daaaad, I can’t get the cap off the toothpaste.”  How often are we like that with our God?  We demand autonomy, but it is often to our own detriment,  and we end up crying out for help.  Thankfully, we are the children of a patient, loving God. We should learn to let God handle it in the first place, and stop trying to do it all on our own.  And as we trust him, we will, in fact, like the toddler, become able to handle life more effectively.  We must allow God to guide and teach us.

And so, you ask… how is Arla?  She is well.  She continues to improve everyday.  Improvement is slow, but it continues.  Pray for Harold that he may have strength and peace.  Life is different now, and life will continue to change.  Pray that Harold may accept all that is and is to come.  Pray that Arla may continue to work hard and want to work hard to regain whatever it is that God has planned.

If you visit, feel free to insist that Arla speak to you.  No, she is not speaking coherent, complete sentences.  However, she needs to begin to communicate more. Harold is more than willing to do the talking for her, and you may have to tell Harold to be quiet so that Arla can try to communicate with you.  It is time for Arla to begin to advocate for herself in daily situations.  Pray that a little tough love will encourage her to ask for what she needs and to not rely on Harold so much.   Pray that Harold’s heart will allow him to let her struggle from time to time, so that she will learn to ask for what she needs.