Benjamin Wheeler has the biggest brown eyes I have ever seen.  He loved his brother, school, soccer, and riding the train.  He had moved from Queens, NY a few years ago.  Again, I try to consider the purpose of the death of one so young.  Mom’s death seemed meaningful in the scheme of the world.  Little Benjamin’s seems senseless….but through these events I am reminded daily to love wholly and not take any moment for granted.  Today, my sister Janeen posted the following on Facebook.  It reminds me to find the joy in EVERY moment and never lose the lesson…..

New Year’s eve is like every other night;
there is no pause in the march of the universe,
no breathless moment of silence among created things
that the passage of another twelve months may be noted;
and yet no man has quite the same thoughts this evening
that come with the coming of darkness on other nights. (Hamilton Wright Mabie)

The family holidays have passed and it’s time for the New Year. Naturally, the New Year is a time to reflect on the past year. While some people look forward to the parties and making resolutions, others dread this time to reflect on the year’s accomplishments… or lack thereof. I believe in setting goals, but I have to remind myself that this is not the time to add up the “score card”. I don’t make New Year’s resolutions because setting goals is something I do daily. Sometimes, I set a long-term goal, while other times I set a goal just for the next hour. This past year (or two) has been rough. I will not lie. Sometimes my goal for the day is just to get out of bed and get dressed. That was my goal for today. Bob twisted my arm, I twisted Kelsey’s arm, Jared joined the majority, and we went snowboarding together. We even stayed together! I didn’t realize it until we left, but I actually spent the longest consecutive amount of time actually on the hill. It was when we were driving home that I realized how late it was because the sun was setting. The sun was a HUGE, fiery red. I watched it get swallowed up into the trees. It looked just like the sunrise I followed to photograph after Mom’s funeral. It made me reflect on the feeling that came over me at that time. Mom’s message- “Even the darkest night will end and the sun will rise.” 

The message Mom sent me today reminded me that December 31st is just like any other night. The sun sets, but in the morning it will rise… and life goes on. 

Year’s end is neither an end nor a beginning but a going on, with all the wisdom that experience can instill in us.

Note:  The sun around 4:30 p.m. on our way back from Lima was making mini-rainbows on either side of a cloud that was covering the sun.  It was like that for a good 30 minutes.  I, personally, often think of God in these moments.  The way the sun streams through clouds is the way I picture God.  Nature, to me is no accident.  If this planet can be this beautiful, I can only image what Heaven must be like.